you’re taking up lots of space your shit is everywhere your breath is all up in my face your hands are swarming in the air you’re the first one out the car and then you’re the loudest one in the bar tell me, is there something wrong, girlfriend? what’s with this new version of who you are? so she lifts her chin and squints at me to assess what i think i know she says, my heart has some dangerous neighborhoods so beware where you try to go they say that the truth will set you free but then so will a lie it depends if you’re trying to get to the promised land or you’re just trying to get by what is a camera but a box of light? what is a guitar but a box of sound? you think i don’t understand but i think i might what it is to harness the emptiness and just ride it around and maybe your chest is an empty shell with ribs of spiraling coral where a perfect pearl of sadness resides but if you ever need an ear i could just come and press it there listen to the sound of the ocean inside

no you didn’t just leave i actually kicked you out i couldn’t hardly believe that the words came out my mouth you couldn’t hardly believe what you heard yourself discuss as you packed up all your things and you said goodbye to us tell me, what is in the way in the way of my love for you? there’s something in the way in the way of my love so now there’s nothing left to lose and the screen just says fini each night in separate rooms we cry separately and every day we yell down each other’s holes two slippery strippers swinging round two poles tell me, what is in the way in the way of my love for you? what is in the way in the way of my love i gotta get it out the way out the way of my love for you there’s something in the way in the way of my love we took down all the pictures then we took down all the walls packed up our expectations piled em up in the hall we bagged our future and kicked it to the curb then we stood there unencumbered and we stood there undeterred cuz we were done clinging to the things we were afraid to lose and the only thing left was a breathtaking view and you looked at me and i looked at you and you said how bout now, baby now what you wanna do? now there’s nothing in the way in the way of my love for you no, there’s nothing in the way in the way of my love i had to get it out the way out the way of my love for you there was something in the way in the way of my love no you didn’t just leave

seems like you just started noticing how noticeably bad things really are and then you walk past this couple arguing in a rolled up window parked car an all that gesticulated bitterness an alla that muffled yelling hell it’s like it just starts wafting at you like a big furry rat died inside of that wall kinda smell bad dreams like this roll in like a cold front thunderous thunder and lightning in tow and your tiny little life gets even smaller as you heed the heavens’ mighty show an i don’t mean heaven like godlike cuz the animal i am knows very well that nature is our teacher and our mother and god is just another story that we tell you’re trying not to grasp not to start grasping at straws or sticks or stones trying to learn to just sit inside your sadness even if you’re sitting there alone cuz just like icarus ascending never intending to look back nature’s law and your tragic flaw are vying to send you flying into the arms of another venus fly trap guzzle till the buzzing stops guzzle till the buzzing stops guzzle till the buzzing stops

she was hungry so hungry she was trying to think clear she kept opening the fridge door looking at the mustard and the beer then finally she went out into the rain carrying her bicycle chain and her feet worked the pedals while her appetite steered after that she just followed her nose and fate is not just whose cooking smells good but which way the wind blows she laid down in her party dress and never got up needless to say she missed the party she just got sad then she got stuck she was wincing like something brittle trying hard to bend she was numb with the terror of losing her best friend but we never see things changing we only see them ending and some vicious whispering voice keeps saying you have no choice you have no choice cuz when i look at you i squint you are that beautiful and my pussy is a tractor and this is a tractor pull i’m haunted by my illicit, explicit dreams and i can’t really wake up so i just drift in between thinking the glass is half empty and thinking it’s not quite full the pouring rain is no place for a bicycle ride try to hit the brakes and you slide and you slide and you slide

your body foreshortened below your shoulders your face so close it’s out of focus way down the hallway comes the sound of your shoes that is what i what i think about when i think about you if we let our love off of its leash do you fear, like i fear how fierce it would be? your headlights sweeping across my ceiling the breadth of my smile now the depth of my feeling way down in my dark life a shaft of your light shines through and that is what i what i think about when i think about you if we let our love off of its leash do you fear, like i fear how fierce it would be? o my my

i walk in stride with people much taller than me and partly it’s the boots but mostly it’s my chi and i’m becoming transfixed with nature and my part in it which i believe just signifies i’m finally waking up and there’s this moth outside my kitchen door she’s bonkers for that bare bulb flying round in circles bashing in her exoskull out in the woods she navigates fine by the moon but get her around a light bulb and she’s doomed she is trying to evolve she’s just trying to evolve now let’s get talking reefer madness like: some arrogant government can’t by any stretch of the imagination outlaw a plant! yes, their supposed authority over nature is a dream c’mon people, we’ve got to come clean cuz they are locking our sons and our daughters in cages they are taking by the thousands our lives from under us it’s a crash course in religious fundamentals now let’s all go to war get some bang for our buck i am trying to evolve i’m just trying to evolve gunnin for high score in the land of dreams morbid bluish-white consumers ogling luminous screens on the trail of forgetting cruising without a care the jet set won’t abide by that pesky jet lag and our lives boil down to an hour or two when someone pulls a camera out of a bag and i am trying to evolve i’m just trying to evolve so i walk like i’m on a mission cuz that’s the way i groove i got more and more to do i got less and less to prove it took me too long to realize that i don’t take good pictures cuz i have the kind of beauty that moves

what’s with that halo hovering above that thick skull spare me if i do say so, i think you’re covering course there was nothing could’ve prepared me for the side effect of this dirty drug the way you punish me and then you shrug what’s with that phone call, baby? it’s like you’re trying just trying to crush me do you feel stronger each time you push me, dear? did you tell your mom you carpet bombed before you left here and is it just the side effect of this dirty drug or does each apology sound more like a shrug are you at home now with your kitty cats are you just at home now with the way that you act do you split the rent there with all your secrets or do you just pretend to all your friends they’re uninvited guests yes and when you want it tidy tell me can you still dispel me? sweep me neatly under the rug does your conscience ever mention the way that you treat me or do you just fend it off with a

i’ll be your biggest fan i will be your fool i’ll be your exception to whatever the rule an i ain’t the type to bitch i ain’t the type to cry i’ll sit at your red light and wait for your shit to go by and this vague little smile is my all-purpose expression the meaning of which i will leave to your discretion my distraction’s my defense against a lack of inspiration against a slow leak deflation the further the horizon the more it holds my gaze and the foreground’s out of focus but, you know, i kinda hope it’s just a phase i’ve been through and through this i know just how it goes you’ll have no idea you’ll have no need to know cuz i will make your body grow wings and take flight i will erase sound i will erase light and this vague little smile is my all-purpose expression the meaning of which i’ll leave to your discretion my distraction’s my defense against a lack of inspiration against a slow leak deflation the further the horizon the more it holds my gaze and the foreground’s out of focus but, you know, i kinda hope it’s just a phase

i bet you’re wondering if you woke up today just to learn why the caged bird sings i bet you’re wondering if the goddesses are all crazy or just keeping it interesting situated slightly outside society at odds with its odd offerings i bet you’re teetering on the edge of sobriety just to alleviate a few things like the fear that you’re standing here cuz you want to be liked you know you need your instrument – but does your instrument need to be miked? you keep imagining that pretty soon you will just disappear and thinking that one thing is what saves you from your fear of being here here for now here for now here for now i bet you’re looking for the little red x next to the red arrow and the words ‘you are here’ i bet you’re hoping that your heart will send up the white flag this time or some sign that the coast is clear yeah, the moment when your heart jumps it’s all that’s happening and once again, it’s like the first time you’ve felt that shock the moment when your heart jumps it’s all that’s happening and i was right behind the door when you knocked thinking maybe i’m just standing here cuz i want to be liked i know i need my instrument – but does my instrument need to be miked? i keep imagining that pretty soon i will just disappear and thinking that one thing is what saves me from my fear of being here here for now here for now here for now

second intermission anticipation you know the third act small talk drops out of the play you’re standing in the lobby tightening your tourniquet waiting for it waiting for it and then the bell sounds and the lights flash and there’s all these questions milling around and there’s no time to ask no bliss for little miss leading she’s learning about bleeding but what is love if not exquisite? our only saving grace (or is it) and somewhere inside your iris blooms the reflection of my surprise as you stroll past every last do not enter and touch me at my epicenter and the bell sounds and the lights flash and there’s all these questions milling around and there’s no time to ask i’m always trying to get there i never really get there to that quiet place where i accept myself instead i’m deep inside some high school locker room no clothing popping the zits of my self-loathing under fluorescent lights and the bell sounds and the lights flash and there’s all these questions milling around and you’re too ashamed to ask second intermission anticipation you know the third act small talk drops out of the play you’re standing in the lobby tightening your tourniquet waiting for it waiting for it

pavlov hits me with more bad news every time i answer the phone so i play and i sing and i just let it ring all day when i’m at home a defacto choice of macro or microcosmic melancholy but, baby, any way you slice it i’m thinkin i could just as soon use the time alone yes, the goons have gone global and the CEOs are shredding files and the democrins and the republicrats are flashing their toothy smiles and uncle tom is posing for a photo op with the oval office clan and uncle sam is rigging cockfights in the promised land and that knife you stuck in my back is still there it pinches a little when i sigh and moan and these days i’m thinkin i could just as soon use the time alone cuz all the wrong people have the power of suggestion and the freedom of the press is meaningless if nobody asks a question i mean, causation by definition is such a complex compilation of factors that to even try to say why is to oversimplify but that’s a far cry, isn’t it dear? from acting like you’re the only one there unrepentantly self-centered and unfair enter all suckers scrambling for the scoop exit mr. eye contact who took his flirt and flew the coop but whatever no matter no fishin trips no fishin mamma’s officially out of commission and did i mention in there somewhere did i mention somewhere in there that i traded babe ruth? yes, i traded the only player that was bigger than the game and i can’t even tell you why cuz you’d think i’m insane and that’s the truth and the music industry mafia is pimping girl power sniping off sharpshooter singles from their styrofoam towers and hip hop is tied up in the back room with a logo stuffed in its mouth cuz the master’s tools will never dismantle the master’s house but then i’m getting away from myself as i get closer and closer to home and the difference between you and me baby is i get fucked up when i’m alone and i must admit today my inner pessimist seems to have got the best of me we start out sugared up on kool-aid and manifest destiny and we memorize all the president’s names like little trained monkeys and then we’re spit into the world so many spinny-eyed t.v. junkies incapable of unravelling the military industrial mystery preemptively pacified with history book history and i’ve been around the world now and i can see this about america: the mind control is steep here, man the myopia is deep here and behold those that try to expose the reality who really try to realize democracy are shot with rubber bullets and gassed off the streets while the global power brokers are kept clean and discreet behind a wall behind a moat and that is all that’s all she wrote and my heart beats an sss o o o sss cuz folks just couldn’t care care care less less less as long as every day is superbowl sunday and larger than life women in lingerie are pouting at us from every bus stop shelovesme shelovesmenot shelovesme shelovesmenot... “big government should not stand between a man and his money” “what’s good for business is good for the country” our children still take that lie like communion the same old line the confederacy used on the union conjugate liberty into libertarian and medicate it associate it with deregulation privatization we won’t even know we’re slaves on a corporate plantation somebody say hallelujah! somebody say damnation! cuz the profit system follows the path of least resistance and the path of least resistance is what makes the river crooked makes it serpentine capitalism is the devil’s wet dream so just give me my judy garland drugs and let me get back to work cuz the empire state building is the tallest building in new york and i always got the feeling you just liked to hear it fall off your tongue but i remember my name in your mouth and i don’t think i was done hearing it close to my ear on a whisper’s way to a moan but pavlov hits me with more bad news every time i answer the phone so i play and i sing and i just let it ring all day when i’m at home a defacto choice of macro or microcosmic melancholy but baby, any way you slice it i’m thinkin i could just as soon use the time alone

welcome to no amount of stoned makes you feel ok welcome to this year’s alone – brought to you by christmas day welcome to the darkness into which praying people pray it’s quiet here except for this song now that everybody’s gone but hey least you don’t have to play along today welcome to something like elation when you first open your eyes just cuz it means that you musta finally got to sleep last night welcome to the precipice between groundlessness and flight it’s quiet here except for this song now that everybody’s gone but hey least you don’t have to play along today besides which welcome to taking the good stuff down off of the shelf and welcome to the art of conversation with yourself welcome to humming an unbroken tune all day long yes it’s quiet here but hey least you don’t have to play along today